November 25th that's what today is. I can not tell you the last time we have had a full school day. A day that’s went by without yelling at my kids or I felt the want to want to keep up on life, two days in a row. This has been a whole month I would say I completely lost! A whole month I would say I got so very little done. I whole month that I think I yelled at my kids more in than I have the whole year. I have worked out a total of one time, don’t know the last time I actually got my water in, or remember the feeling of feeling capable of being a good wife, friend, person or mother my kids, husband, friends deserve.
I say I lost a month cause it feels like I have. Dilynn turned 4 this month on the 3rd and it feels like a dream, so long ago.
It was the day before Halloween the kids and I were in a car crash that totalled my car. Everyone by the grace of God walked away ok. I on the other hand have struggled mentally day after day. I didn’t drive for the following two weeks after and now really one do if it is absolutely necessary, averaging once a week. Mentally I just can not shake the fear, the self doubt, the stress that I am ruining everything around me. Which makes it very hard to homeschool. Mental health is no joke and will admit I have had episodes in the past that I have felt crippled by it - but nothing like this. I will write more on mental health in the future, for today I will send you over to my friend Ashley Jackson who writes a lot of her story on her blog.
Today I wanted to sit down with you and talk homeschool. Looking back on this year I feel like we should be way more than half way, we started back in the beginning of April. We maybe half way now that we didn’t school any really in the month of November. Loosing this month has brought me to realize how much I have to keep preaching to myself what I want for my family and why we believe it’s important. Not to be comparing myself to others. So, what if it will take us a year and a half to get through some curriculum? So what? As long as my kids are learning and we are moving forward as a family thats all that matters. Right? Yes, at least to me.
Preach To Yourself by Haylee Morgan is a great read or listen to. I have applied it to every area of my life because she speaks so much gospel truth. I keep reminding myself of all the good and what God has done for me, even on my darkest days.
As I start planning the rest of this school year and what I want it to look like for us, there are two things I want to start applying to our term that starts in January. The first being for myself. Abby at Full Time Wife Life has began these goal setting videos over on her YouTube channel, that she picks one thing to focus on as a homeschooler and as a person. I am going to start implementing some as well. I like the idea of one per area of life, it doesn't seem so overwhelming this way. As well as knowing you always have next month to work on something else.
Next is from Ashley at Grace and Grit, who also has a YouTube channel, and has started alternating science and history per term. This idea is amazing, you can truly focus on that subject for the semester. Because if your like me and do history, one week and than not get to the other for that week and later feel guilty about it. The only problem with starting this system is I need to find good stopping points with both of these curriculums and decide which to start in January. But am truly excited for this change starting the new year.
As I feel like I have lost the the whole month of November homeschooling wise, I know a few things at the same time; one school will always be there and when we don’t get to it - it will wait for us. Two, God has a plan for it all - even though I many days wish I could see His plan sometimes I am grateful he has it under control. And three, I have to admit it was a nice break loving on my kiddos and having Hulu marathons. As I continue to go throughout the end of the year I will just keep preaching to myself!
If you haven’t read Haylee Morgan’s book, Preach To Yourself
Do yourself a favor and give yourself an early Christmas present. I have the audio version and love it!